Doug Picirillo's Blog

Dig Deep To Make Ambitious Resolutions Stick

2011-12-30T22:16:00.000-08:00

Are you making one or more ambitious New Year's resolutions? If you hope to change a long-held habit or deeply ingrained behavior, you will have to dig deep. In essence, you're job is to persuade yourself that the change is more than just a good idea. It is worthy of true commitment that makes sense and resonates with what you believe about yourself and what you value so that you can develop a new day-to-day attitude to support the new behavior. If you don't think it through in this way, you risk fighting with yourself to make the resolution stick. You will be of two minds. Part of you wants to change, but there is a part of you that remains unconvinced. This conflict usually leads to failed resolutions. You simply wear yourself out trying to do something that you don't believe in 100%.

Except for trivial matters, almost all of your choices and based on the network of beliefs, attitudes, and values that has grown in depth and complexity over time, sometimes years, sometimes over the course of your entire life. As an example, you might resolve to fill up your car at a different gas station because of something you have recently learned about your old favorite's environmental practices. If you feel strongly enough about this issue, you will effortlessly change your routine.

To keep this real, you do not need professional counseling or deep soul searching to break every bad habit or to start something new and beneficial. Sometimes behavior change can lead to a new attitude. Sometimes, through sheer force of will you can develop a new habit that will produce its own reward in how you feel and think. Your might find that willpower alone is enough to get into an effective exercise routine. You start to see physical benefits. You feel better. You automatically convince yourself that it is worth the time and effort and stick with it.

Whatever your situation and whatever your resolutions may be, don't agonize about them. If they're a good idea, just go. Get started. But if you have tried and failed to do the same thing in the past, take some time to dig deep and work out why your were not successful. What change do you have to make in your thoughts and feelings foundation to build the proper support for your new choices?

Thinking Ahead About New Year's Resolutions That Stick

2011-12-23T09:26:00.000-08:00

If you’re like me at all, you may have made any number of New Year’s resolutions over the years, only to fail miserably at keeping them, sometimes after some weeks or months, sometimes after only days. So how do we make resolutions that we will keep? It helps to start thinking about them now, instead of coming up with a spur-of-the-moment good idea on December 31. So, what makes an idea a “better idea” and one that is more likely to stick? Most of our hasty resolutions are based only on the anticipated benefits. We fall short when we run into the costs of keeping the resolution, costs that we are unprepared to pay. Sometimes we lack the necessary support in our family and social circles. Sometimes, we just don’t believe in ourselves. We expect ourselves to fail.

Here are five questions. Ask yourself each of them and answer honestly. Then you will have a well thought-out resolution that will lead to a permanent and meaningful change in behavior.

What are the benefits? These are the same things that come to mind when we come up with those good ideas that don’t last. The difference however is this. Spend a little time thinking through all of the benefits, not just the obvious ones, short term and long term. Sell yourself on the benefits. Make a good case.
What are the costs? What is it going to cost you in time, effort, discomfort and inconvenience to see this through? Prepare yourself to accept whatever sacrifices will come your way.
What about other people? What are others going to have to do to support me in this? What changes must my family make? My coworkers? Others? Will they be supportive? How do you get them behind you? As you line up support, you also create beneficial external pressure to stick with your plan.
What do you think about yourself? Think about your ability to follow through and make positive change in your life. Where have you had success in the past? Envision repeating that success. Make a plan to incorporate what went right and to avoid what went wrong.
Is your goal realistic? This is both the first and the last question. Don’t make resolutions that are beyond anybody’s realistic ability to achieve. Don’t try to lose 100 pounds by Valentine’s Day. Create a plan to lose weight gradually and safely through sustainable changes in your habits. Are you deeply in debt? You probably won’t dig your way out by March, but you can resolve to make a two-year or three-year plan and to live with a spending plan that is below your income. The surest way to fail is to attempt the impossible.

In short…five actions:

Plan a realistic goal.
Focus on every way that you and others will benefit.
Be prepared for the costs and to make the necessary sacrifices.
Enlist the support of others.
Believe in yourself.

Hope for Haiti

2010-01-22T17:54:00.000-08:00

I was looking through today's mail just as the Hope for Haiti benefit began on just about every television network. One piece of mail was from Compassion International encouraging us to take a few minutes to write to a beautiful girl whom we have sponsored for several years, Clairciane. She lives in Haiti, west of Port au Prince, about 20 miles from the epicenter.

Over 6o,000 children are enrolled in Compassion's programs in Haiti, about 10% of them in Port au Prince. Approximately 50 of Compassion's centers were affected by the earthquake. So far, Compassion has reports from only 28 of them. At least 100 children are known to have died, dozens injured and hundreds left homeless. Who knows how many have lost a father or mother, a sister or a brother?

I was struck by the timing as I opened the mail today. When was that mailing planned? Almost certainly before the earthquake. That it would arrive today and that I would find it at the very beginning of the TV benefit is only a small thing. But it is a poignant reminder that we are all in this journey together. We hope to hear soon that Clairciane and her family are safe. We pray and wait with hope, hope for Clairciane, hope for Haiti.

How soon we forget!

2010-01-21T20:36:00.001-08:00

Or shall I put that in the form of a question, "How soon will we forget?"

How soon before most of us forget about Haiti? I hate to seem a cynic but I know how we are. Once the shocking news coverage slows down, we'll begin to forget and I fear that we will mostly forget long before the misery is relieved.

Feel free to point out why I'm wrong. I'd love to be wrong about this.

Take A 9/11 Coffee Break

2009-09-11T06:07:00.000-07:00

A lot of people, including me, just can't get started in the morning without our coffee. You see us walking down the street, sipping from a paper cup. You see us driving with one hand on the wheel and another holding a travel mug.

It occurred to me this morning, while thinking about 9/11, thinking about what's important and what isn't, that if I really like coffee, if it is really more than just a habit, that I ought to sit down, take five or ten minutes and enjoy it.

Today especially, eight years on since that horrible Tuesday morning of September 11, 2001, we all could use a pause. Take a few moments to remember the victims, their families and the heroes of that day. Just take a few moments and consider what it means to be an American and how that changed eight years ago.

Take a few minutes and enjoy a nice cup of coffee. Please. Do it in honor of those friends, neighbors, business associates and strangers who were just arriving at work that morning, carrying a nice cup of coffee and a bagel; or those who had been at their desk for a while and were thinking about having a second cup. Have a nice cup of coffee today. Seriously. But while you do, don't forget those who had their last cup of coffee that morning. Never forget about them.

The Human Trafficking Supply Chain

2009-09-09T06:42:00.000-07:00

Suppliers and Consumers

When we talk about the international trade in illegal drugs, we sometimes talk about supplier countries and consumer countries. There is supply and there is demand, connected by a supply chain. Likewise, human trafficking is a supply chain business estimated at over $9 billion / year.

Supply

Poverty and lack of education and awareness create vulnerability. The most vulnerable, the children of the poor, are the primary supply source for human traffickers.

Demand

For those victims who are trafficked for "simple forced labor", the demand is a matter of greed, absent oversight of working conditions and broken economies. When victims are trafficked into the sex trade, the demand question is even uglier. Call it an addiction, depravity or what you will. There would be no trade without consumers.

What can we do?
What we must do is intervene where we can, anywhere along the chain. Education, economic development and law enforcement are just three of the possible interventions. Born To Fly International emphasizes education. Today is a great day to help them out. RIGHT NOW, they are in the midst of a one-day fundraiser... looking for 9,000 gifts of $9 so they can go to press with their first wordless children's book. Please help out at http://born2fly.org/ and then tell a friend!

Fanatic At Large

2009-09-08T09:53:00.001-07:00

William Wilberforce, the great British abolitionist once said, “If to be feelingly alive to the sufferings of my fellow-creatures is to be a fanatic, I am one of the most incurable fanatics ever permitted to be at large.” I do not have the passion or persistence of Wilberforce but I know that his work is not done. Although the British Empire abolished the slave trade during his lifetime and slavery as an institution soon after his death in 1833, the buying, selling and exploitation of our “fellow-creatures” continues today, in 2009.

The problem of human trafficking and modern day slavery is massive and reaches nearly every country. It almost seems too big, too widespread to defeat but the size of our foe should not determine the size of our fight. We must persist. We must do what we can. Mother Theresa said, “We ourselves feel that what we are doing is just a drop in the ocean. But the ocean would be less because of that missing drop.”

As I have been writing about for several days (this is the eighth of nine blogs on the topic), Diana Scimone, Founder and President of Born To Fly International, is one of those "fanatics at large" who cares beyond all normal measure for her "fellow creatures." Her organization is working against human trafficking and deserves our help and support. Tomorrow, 9-9-9, they are looking for 9,000 friends who can spare a mere $9 each to help them publish educational materials aimed at raising awareness of children and parents around the world. Please take a look: http://born2fly.org

Seven of Nine... Resistance Is Futile

2009-09-06T20:29:00.000-07:00

Seven Of Nine

Okay, I admit it. That's a shameless attempt to attract trekkies to this blog. But now that you're here, please read on. This is day seven of nine of blogging and tweeting about human trafficking and, more specifically, asking for your support of Born To Fly International (http://born2fly.org/).

For better or worse, the Star Trek franchise has always contained subplots rich in social commentary. Ocassionally compelling, some were subtle allegory while others were awkward and contrived. The clearest statement on racism, for example, was made in Let That Be Your Last Battlefield (original air date 1/10/69). But what of Seven of Nine, the Star Trek: Voyager character played by Jeri Ryan, who has been rescued from the Borg collective. What do she and the Borg represent? Her presence on Voyager gives the lie to the Borg claim "You will be assimilated. Resistance is futile." The Borg are the ultimate human traffickers, in fact enslaving humanoid races from across the galaxy, turning their captives into cyborgs and submerging all personality and individuality deep below the collective consciousness.

The complete dehumanization perpetrated by the Borg seems to most of us something that would only happen in science fiction, centuries and light-years away. Yet, something equally horrific happens every hour of the day, today, right now on planet Earth. Children are sold, abducted and enslaved in the sex trade and other forms of forced labor. For most, resistance truly is futile. It is difficult to imagine how the tide can be turned against this industry, estimated at over $9 billion each year.

We cannot accept futility.

We must believe that we can do something. We must do something. Initiatives are in play all over the world. In the big cities, even Chicago area, where I am writing, law enforcement is stepping up its efforts. Yes, human trafficking, modern day slavery exists right here in "The Land of Lincoln." Across the world, relief agencies are working against the social and economic roots of the problem. Others are working to educate children and their parents so they can avoid falling prey to the traffickers. Born To Fly hopes to raise about $81,000 this week to publish trans-cultural educational resoureces to accomplish just that. This is a "crowdfunding" effort. They're really just looking for about $9 from each of about 9,000 people. If you can help, please visit http://born2fly.org/.

Resistance is not futile.

PS: Monday, September 7th is the Labor Day holiday. I'm posting early so I can take a day off-line. Have a great day!

On One Thing, We Can Agree

2009-09-06T11:24:00.000-07:00

Day 6 of 9 on Human Trafficking and In Support of Born To Fly International

God Is With The Vulnerable And Poor
Speaking at the National Prayer Breakfast in February of 2006, U2 star Bono said that "all faiths and ideologies" can agree on one thing, "that God is with the vulnerable and poor. "

The children of the poor are the most vulnerable of the vulnerable. They are the victims of choice for human traffickers. A friend of mine who as a child was among the invisible street children of Kolkata, tells of his childhood friends who simply disappeared. Their families had no resources and no voice. When a child disappeared, he or she was simply gone.

Let Your Light Rise
Bono reminds us that if we want to align our heart with God's heart, then our heart will be with the poor. "God is in the slums, in the cardboard boxes where the poor play house… God is in the silence of a mother who has infected her child with a virus that will end both their lives… God is in the cries heard under the rubble of war… God is in the debris of wasted opportunity and lives, and God is with us if we are with them. 'If you remove the yolk from your midst, the pointing of the finger and speaking wickedness, and if you give yourself to the hungry and satisfy the desire of the afflicted, then your light will rise in darkness and your gloom with become like midday and the Lord will continually guide you and satisfy your desire in scorched places.'"

That passage from Isaiah 58 is but one of more than 2,100 that mention the poor and to make it clear that those of us who have plenty bear a responsibility to those who have less than enough. Speaking of the poor, Jesus said, 'As you have done it unto the least of these my brethren, you have done it unto me.' (Matthew 25:40).

What Can You Do For The Least Of These?
There is no shortage of choices. Here are two.

Sponsor A Child Today Through Compassion International When you sponsor a child through Compassion, you make a huge difference in the life of that child and help to break the cycle of poverty and extreme vulnerability.

Support Born To Fly International's Education Campaign Born To Fly has prepared educational materials about the perils of human trafficking, suitable for children and parents in any culture. They need your help to go to press and begin to distribute these materials to waiting schools, churches and relief agencies.

Simple Numbers

2009-09-05T08:57:00.000-07:00

Day 5 of tweeting and blogging in support of Born To Fly International's crowdfunding campaign.

The numbers behind the campaign:

The goal is to raise $81,000 by asking 9,000 to chip in $9 by 9-9-9.

How do we find 9,000 people?

I tell 9 people. We are 10.
Those 9 each tell 9 more. 81 new people. We are 91.
The next 81 each tell 9 more. 729 new people. We are 820.
The next 729 each tell 9 more. 6,561 new people. We are 7,381.
The next 6,561 each tell 9 more. 59,049 new people. We are 66,430.

It night not go exactly like that, but it could. The numbers are simple.

Your $9 contribution is hugely important. But please, tell a friend or two or three or nine and ask them to pass it on!

Participate. Encourage others. Simple.

Thank God It's Friday?

2009-09-04T06:07:00.000-07:00

Why do we thank God for Fridays? Really, there isn't anything more reliable in our lives than the rising and setting of the sun. Once in every seven times, we call it Friday. So what's the big deal?

For most of us, "Thank God it's Friday" is a way of saying how glad we are that the relative freedom of the weekend is at hand. But for many, there is no meaningful freedom, neither on the weekend nor on any other day. Among these are the millions of victims of human trafficking, living in some form of modern-day slavery, in forced labor, in the sex trade, deprived of any form of personal freedom.

This is day four of my nine-day tweet-and-blogathon in support of Born To Fly International. If you haven't already visited their site (http://born2fly.org), please do so between now and 9-9-9 and chip in nine bucks if you can. While you're there, please take some time to read about their work and the massive problem they are committed to fight. If you haven't already told a friend, please do so today. And when you do, please ask them to tell a friend too.

Thanks and... Let's not take our freedom for granted this weekend.

I was nine years old when I was abducted

2009-09-03T13:08:00.000-07:00

I was nine years old when I was abducted. True story. I was nine years old when I was abducted, along with another boy, in New York's Riverside Park. One of the two abductors claimed to have a gun in his pocket. We had no choice but to believe him. The details of what happened next aren't particularly important. What is important is how a nine year old boy feels in that situation. I was too naïve to know all of the possibilities. If I did, I'm sure I would have been even more scared than I was. Even so, I experienced the full measure of fear for my life.

The whole thing didn't last very long. By the grace of God, we were soon set free. These guys were just looking for some quick, sick "fun". We received good medical attention at the emergency room and were home with our families by evening. In spite of the short duration of the event and the lack of permanent physical injury, the events of that day left a deep and permanent impression.

Today, all these years later, I have a tiny window into the suffering felt by the victims of human trafficking. That's one of the reasons I am so passionate about the mission of organizations like Born To Fly International. A million kids lose their lives to human trafficking each year, not their physical lives, but their future. Unless they are among the fortunate few who are rescued and given a chance to reclaim their future, all of their rights and opportunities, their hopes and dreams - all that makes one truly alive, is stolen from them.

Human trafficking, violence against the weak and exploitation of the vulnerable are massive problems with many variations, from small parallel stories like mine and bigger stories like Jaycee Dugard's 18-year imprisonment, to the $9 billion worldwide organized sex trade. There is no single solution. The problem must be confronted from many angles. We can all do SOMETHING. Will you join me between now and 9-9-9, next Wednesday, by chipping in at least $9 to Born To Fly International's education project? Click here to visit their web site.

Nine! Nine! Nine!

2009-09-02T06:03:00.000-07:00

"Nine! Nine! Nine!" sounds just like "Nein! Nein! Nein!" but it's not. (Nicht nein sage ich "No! No! No!" auf Deutsch. )

Nine Means Yes
Instead of "No! No! No!" I'm asking you to say "Yes! Yes! Yes!"

In seven days, on 9-9-9 Born To Fly International is looking for nine-thousand nine-dollar contributions so they can go to press with educational materials to raise awareness about child human trafficking for at-risk children and their parents around the world.

So can you spare a NINE? (Do you ever wonder why the United States Treasury doesn't print nine-dollar bills? Honestly, neither do I.)

Please visit Born To Fly International and read about their work. Please consider a $9 gift. If you think this is important, tell 9 friends. Then, if you can, please think of 9 other ways you can help support this important cause.

You could...

Write nine blog posts (sound familiar?)
Post nine Twitter updates
Find nine related links and share them on Facebook or wherever you share stuff

No Big Commitment Required, Just Do SOMETHING

This is no big commitment. You can help this good organization achieve an important milestone and then go back to whatever it is you do. But please do something between now and 9-9-9. Share 9 bucks. Tell 9 friends. Whatever... This is a good idea and as Harvey Mackay says, "Getting a good idea should be like sitting on a pin. It should make you jump up and do something!"

Better than sudoku, a numbers game that can save a life

2009-09-01T04:56:00.000-07:00

No Sudoku For Me

I don’t play Sudoku but I do enjoy an occasional numbers game. Well, here’s something that grabbed my attention – a play on the number nine that has nothing to do with fun and games. On 9/9/9, Born to Fly International (http://born2fly.org/) is asking you to consider a $9 donation to support their extremely important cause. It would be really cool if you would also tell 9 friends about it. Nine of your dollars plus nine of your friends on 9/9/9. How cool is that?

So what is this important cause anyway?

What? The cool numbers game isn’t enough? Of course not. Okay. Let’s get serious. Born to Fly was founded by veteran journalist Diana Scimone to help fight the hideous practice of human trafficking – especially the enslavement of young children in the sex trade. What could be more heinous and more exploitive? The mission at Born to Fly is educating kids and their parents about the dangers of trafficking, with the ultimate goal of ending it. They have been working on a wordless book that teaches kids to make wise choices – wordless so they don’t have to translate it into hundreds of languages. Along with a companion curriculum, the wordless book is nearly ready for publication. That’s where you come in. Born to Fly needs funding to get the materials published and into the waiting hands of schools, missions and aid organizations. Your $9 donation might just make the crucial difference in a child’s life.

Check it out!

Visit http://born2fly.org/. Read about it. Think about it. Pray about it. Do something about it.

Slum Dog Millionaire

2009-04-07T06:19:00.000-07:00

We saw Slum Dog Millionaire for the second time this past weekend. I'll try not to say too much about why I like it in case you haven't seen it. We found it to be one of the best movies we have ever seen. Yes, there are some difficult scenes and some things that might anger certain groups, but the overall effect is an amazing tapestry of current social issues and classical dramatic themes.

Slum Dog Millionaire is technically brilliant with outstanding acting that stays within the boundaries of the characters. The characters are thus accessible and human, not exaggerated portraits but realistic portrayals. The direction is creative but not distracting. The real star of the show is the story itself that touches on so many important and challenging questions. It is one of those rare films that you can watch again and again, each time finding something new about the story, and if you are willing, something new about yourself.

Illinois' Legal Snowblower

2009-01-09T05:07:00.000-08:00

A member of the Illinois State House of Representatives' Impeachment Committee said that yesterday was a good and happy day for the State of Illinois. It was good, he said, because the committee had voted to recommend impeachment of Governor Rod Blagojevich and in doing so had demonstrated that nobody is above the law.

Wouldn't it be better and happier if such demonstrations were not necessary on a regular basis? This Democractic Governor stands charged with federal crimes and will likely be impeached, if he does not resign first. His immediate predecessor, Republican George Ryan, remains in jail for his conviction on corruption charges. It's been a long time since we have had a governor who has ended up as a criminal defendant.

Perhaps our politicians are a little bit like our weather. We live in a land of extremes. We can have beautiful, mild summers. We can also have brutally hot ones. We can have mild winters that are not too snowy and not too cold. We can also have winters like the one we are having now, exceptionally snowy and exceptionally cold. We have had some seasons of good gubernatorial leadership. Former Governors Jim Thompson and Jim Ryan are both recent (within the lifetime of our youngest voters) examples who show that politicians are not universally corrupt.

Let's hope that once the Blagojevich blizzard ends, that we have a long spring and summer of better government. Let's hope for many years ahead of good, happy days and a more pleasant political climate where we don't need regular demonstrations that nobody is above the law.

2008-11-25T06:03:00.000-08:00

In the United States, we celebrate Thanksgiving day on the last Thursday of November, two days from now. Given the historic nature and sociological significance of the recent Presidential election, I thought it might be good to consider the first Thanksgiving Day proclamation, signed by George Washington, the first President of the United States of America.

General Thanksgiving
By the PRESIDENT of the United States Of America
A PROCLAMATION

WHEREAS it is the duty of all nations to acknowledge the providence of Almighty God, to obey His will, to be grateful for His benefits, and humbly to implore His protection and favour; and Whereas both Houses of Congress have, by their joint committee, requested me "to recommend to the people of the United States a DAY OF PUBLICK THANSGIVING and PRAYER, to be observed by acknowledging with grateful hearts the many and signal favors of Almighty God, especially by affording them an opportunity peaceably to establish a form of government for their safety and happiness:"

NOW THEREFORE, I do recommend and assign THURSDAY, the TWENTY-SIXTH DAY of NOVEMBER next, to be devoted by the people of these States to the service of that great and glorious Being who is the beneficent author of all the good that was, that is, or that will be; that we may then all unite in rendering unto Him our sincere and humble thanks for His kind care and protection of the people of this country previous to their becoming a nation; for the signal and manifold mercies and the favorable interpositions of His providence in the course and conclusion of the late war; for the great degree of tranquility, union, and plenty which we have since enjoyed;-- for the peaceable and rational manner in which we have been enabled to establish Constitutions of government for our safety and happiness, and particularly the national one now lately instituted;-- for the civil and religious liberty with which we are blessed, and the means we have of acquiring and diffusing useful knowledge;-- and, in general, for all the great and various favours which He has been pleased to confer upon us.

And also, that we may then unite in most humbly offering our prayers and supplications to the great Lord and Ruler of Nations and beseech Him to pardon our national and other transgressions;-- to enable us all, whether in publick or private stations, to perform our several and relative duties properly and punctually; to render our National Government a blessing to all the people by constantly being a Government of wise, just, and constitutional laws, discreetly and faithfully executed and obeyed; to protect and guide all sovereigns and nations (especially such as have shown kindness unto us); and to bless them with good governments, peace, and concord; to promote the knowledge and practice of true religion and virtue, and the increase of science among them and us; and, generally to grant unto all mankind such a degree of temporal prosperity as he alone knows to be best.

GIVEN under my hand, at the city of New-York, the third day of October, in the year of our Lord, one thousand seven hundred and eighty-nine.

(Signed) G. Washington
Source: The Massachusetts Centinel, Wednesday,
October 14, 1789

Making A Difference... One Child At a Time

2008-02-12T16:24:00.000-08:00

In the time it takes you to read this paragraph, it is likely that at least one child will become an orphan because of HIV/AIDS and another two or three may die of hunger or because of a preventable or curable disease. The problem is huge. The numbers are overwhelming. But please join me in reducing those numbers, one child at a time. Sponsor a child today with Compassion International.

Sponsoring children in need is breaking the cycle of poverty

Compassion International exists as a Christian child advocacy ministry that releases children from spiritual, economic, social and physical poverty and enables them to become responsible, fulfilled Christian adults.

Founded by the Rev. Everett Swanson in 1952, Compassion began providing Korean War orphans with food, shelter, education and health care, as well as Christian training.

Today, Compassion helps more than 950,000 children in 24 countries.

Click the graphic to learn

more about child sponsorship